Why I Love Female Pioneers (and you should too) Part 2

Great Interview with Jocelyn Bell Burnell on CBC Radio today. A woman who managed to live long enough to see her achievements acknowledged directly, instead of just posthumously and begrudgingly when word got out on the internet! Still took 50 years but hey… why should that matter, don’t be so ungrateful, right? 🤗 😖

Jocelyn Bell Burnell is an astrophysicist who, as a postgraduate student, discovered the first radio pulsars in 1967 aka…

“one of the most significant scientific achievements of the 20th Century”.[10] 

The next quote had an error but I fixed it.

HER The discovery was recognised by the award of the Nobel Prize in Physics to her thesis supervisor Antony Hewish[5][6] and to the astronomer Martin Ryle.

Bell was excluded, despite having been the first to observe and precisely analyse the pulsars.

Here she is! In 1967 already being smarter than every dude around her.

Of course as a woman, she knew to speak very kindly and diplomatically when asked on the radio about; being bare snubbed while watching a Nobel Prize get awarded to some dudes, who hadn’t done shit but were in a position of power / deemed more appropriate for such recognition, by other dudes (and by themselves coz they sure as heck didn’t – refuse to receive the prize,  while pointing out it was kinda her achievement not theirs and demanding she be included – did they? NOPE).



So Jocelyn simply got on with her  awesome trail-blazer life as a pioneering astrophysicist, (and Mum and Quaker, but not as a Nobel Peace Prize Winner). Because that’s what “nice” Female Pioneers do!

Or they can self destruct, in a broken hearted haze of self medicating behaviours, preferably quietly and away from the people who stole your shit please.

Or settle down, pop out some kids, get divorced and work at Walmart, until you get recognized and shamed by the media.

Just providing some alternate options. Take your pick!

And now here’s Jocelyn, wearing some 1970’s colours in the 1990’s, coz she don’t care for your paltry fashion trends, she’s too busy figuring out Dark Matter and The Universe… with her lady brain!

Jocelyn Bell Burnell everybody! 


Official recipient of the 2018 Endless Kweirdo Posse Award for bUtch-slapping science! 

Because she did it anyway and continues to



pRide Or Die – insomnia edition

I can’t do tricks yet but “ponking” things I’m not supposed to, with my cute little wheel is proving to be pretty satisfying. Let’s proceed…



Yeah but rubber is an insulator so… Ponk!

Rode down this giant hill with wet brakes and scared myself slightly but it went well. 😃

Trespassed a little.

Twice, to establish it wasn’t accidental. 😏

And documented the whole thing with my cell phone.

Now here’s the insomnia bit

I’m not a morning person because of insomnia. I hate helpful suggestions to solve this. “Sleep hygiene” tips are the equivalent of telling a person having a panic episode to “calm down” or to “try mindfulness”, like telling someone with depression to just “snap out of it” or find a hobby… because that worked for you. It doesn’t for them though … that’s the fricken point! If it was that easy your “helpful advice” would have solved a lot of the worlds problems and you’d be off enjoying your Nobel Peace Prize. Thanks though. 😒

What does work for ME – since I stopped listening to that sleep hygiene shit (and implications I hadn’t tried hard enough when IT FAILED) – is sleeping whenever I can and taking naps! So, the opposite of “sleep hygiene” then actually and I get more and better sleep for it! I went for a sleep test once but IT FAILED to yield a result because I couldn’t sleep the entire night. The technician looked at me like I’d done it on purpose to be stroppy and prevent her “result form” from being successfully filled out. I also wasn’t given another opportunity.

My thoughts:

If insomnia could be solved simply through sleep hygiene, mindfulness and chamomile godawful tea which tastes like a cardboard box… it wouldn’t be such a prevailing problem in our society to begin with would it?

Oh and could be removed from the symptom list of many larger conditions too like:

ADHD (which I have), or chronic pain, dementia, anxiety, depression, hormonal / endocrine system issues, exhaustion, menopause, trauma, ptsd, hostile environments, crohns, celiacs, degenerative diseases (insert your own massive list of reasons people get insomnia as needed) you get the idea. If insomnia could be “solved” it would have been so already and there’d be way less self-medicating in the world, I reckon.

So I went for a bike ride instead. That’s the point here and at 7am because I was tired, of laying awake, not being able to get settled. Then I took care of house stuff, enjoyed a couple of hours of smoke & fire alarm testing in my building and slept like a baby afterwards.

What made all of his feel much better than it would have was Today’s Ride! I got the fleeting impression my back and shoulders felt better than they usually do upon waking too… time will tell. 🤗

Anonymous BMX don’t care if I haven’t slept for 2 nights, we going splorin’ 💝

pRide Or Die

Today I will ride.

Every day, rain or shine, to rebuild my strength and stamina after having my health ruined last year. On days when all I can manage is 15 minutes then that’s all I do.

I’ve always loved bikes… no one has time to fuck with you on a bike coz you’re not a sitting target. So for me they were freedom and sometimes my escape, literally. From the hell I grew up in.

And trees… I used to sit high up in trees, quietly for hours, camouflaged, not being fucked with. Until I was 10 there were no trees near me. So I hid on roofs and lay down flat so that no one could see me… and made no noise, all day.

#AnonymousBMX … today’s ride. 🌈🦄🚲

#selfcompassion #mychallenge #traumarecovery #brainonfire #hopes

pRide Or Die

I built my new BMX on Thursday. I own several bikes but rarely ride them now. I’ve been looking at why this is… and unsurprisingly, there’s a slate from the past to be wiped clean.

💝 Slate Cleaner 💝 – a gift from me, to me.

What’s on this particular slate doesn’t matter. That it’s there does. That I located it and figured out exactly how to clean it matters most of all. Will it be easy? No not really. But neither were all the fucking dirty slates I was left to carry. So carry your own shitty abuse slate please, I’m off for a bike ride and if something breaks on my bikes now, I know how to fix it.

As a child I rode for the joy of it, towards fun, with friends, towards safe spaces. Not on errands. Not to work. Not to stretch my resources while in poverty. When does cycling stop being fun? Is it when you become self conscious of your body, made aware your “tomboy phase” is getting a bit too long for OTHER PEOPLES COMFORT LEVELS? Or when you grow too tall for “kids bikes” and finally achieve the status of adult?

Wheel size then… and the need for a justifiable reason, a grown up reason, with a destination. While riding in a manner deemed appropriate for your assigned gender.

Well that makes the solutions pretty simple doesn’t it? Tiny bike, nowhere to go, no reason for doing so. While looking like me and not in the designated cycling zones. Sorted. 🌈🦄🚲


Pffft #STOPfail … clearly Electro goes where the fk it wants and so shall I… like allllllll over this luscious grass on a tiny bike, then gone before anyone can voice their ignorant, unsolicited opinions! YESSSSSSS 🚴🏻‍♂️🌪 *whoosh* <– kinda like that but slower, unsteady and with some wincing as I used muscles that’d been dormant for years. 😂

Fun factor 6/10 👍🏻

Why I love female pioneers (and you should too)!

But first… Delia Derbyshire everybody!
delia at the controls.jpg
Delia Derbyshire (5 May 1937 – 3 July 2001) was an English musician and composer of electronic music.[2] She is best known for her pioneering work with the BBC Radiophonic Workshop during the 1960s, particularly her popular electronic arrangement of the theme music to the British science-fiction television series Doctor Who.[3][4]She has been referred to as “the unsung heroine of British electronic music.”
You can listen to the

Original Dr Who Theme HERE
As created by Delia Derbyshire. 

Her original arrangement served as Doctor Who’s main theme for its first seventeen seasons, from 1963-80. The theme was reworked over the years, to her horror, and the version that had her “stamp of approval” is her original one. She would not be credited on-screen for her work until Doctor Who’s 50th anniversary special, The Day of the Doctor.

(Which aired in 2013 so her first acknowledgement and credit for creating one of the most innovative and well known theme tunes in British Television HIStory …was given over a decade after her death.)

Here’s Delia in the 1970’slooking how most of us would from hearing our creation on telly, every damn week forever, with no credit given.
On 20 November 2017 Derbyshire was awarded a posthumous PhD for her pioneering contributions to electronic music.
How kind. Fat lot of good that’s gonna do her!

So why do I love female pioneers & why should you?

Because they did it anyway. They did it back then. They did it when it was even harder and even more isolating that it is now. For little to no recognition of their achievements during their lifetime and often with the added creative heartbreak, of seeing someone else take the credit. So, unsurprisingly there’s a common theme of addiction and depression in the back stories of female, queer and other marginalized pioneers. Pre-internet options for coping with anxiety, depression, isolation or being “different” – were pretty limited.
The reason we get to have the discourse we have today at all, is because of those who fought for it alone before us, often departing with little to no validation that it was ever going to matter. Lets face it, 2018 and we’re still “trying” to close the pay gap? *eye roll* I’m sure you have your own endless list of Equality Fails too, before we even get to Gender Roles and consequences of not conforming to them. But consider this:

We’re using the most powerful tool a pioneer could ever hope for right now, the internet. Imagine what we could do with “micro-pioneering” in large numbers, in a community.

So go on with your history-making self.  Make it count. Have that voice, Make that choice, Write those words. Reach out. Shine Your Light Bright, So Your “Others” Can Find You.

Below is a piece of music I composed a few years ago in honour of Delia Derbyshire, using her original recording, as a way of bringing it out of the past, into the present where it still belongs. Gratitude for those who walked alone before us, keeps legacies alive. Lest we forget that previous Pioneers already made OUR lives easier in ways we rarely stop to think about.

Check it out!

fuSionEX vs. Derbyshire (Dr Who)

VISIBILITY. Brave. Vulnerable. Fueled by smiles…

I firmly believe that VISIBILITY is one of the most thankless and most vital forms of Daily Activism

Need the quick takeaway?

  • Here is how you can help, fix the thankless bit. A few short easy steps, type *two words, you’re  done!  (*Thank You)
  • Thank activists, thank online community founders, thank those who inspire and uplift you or expend energy trying to
  • Thank other activists, if you are one. That’s how you grow community… it’s not a “Dance Off” from different sides of the room. But do so authentically, don’t be a self serving spam-bot!
  • Why’s it thankless? Because you never know who saw you
  • Why’s it vital? Because you never know who saw you


For the back story on why it’s the best takeaway you’ve had in ages, read on…

IMG_0169 2First, a mysterious graphic to draw you in
Why? That’s at the end haha!


As an introvert I read, research, ponder, observe, appreciate… SO many things, yet rarely take the time to reach outwards. Last year, in an attempt to challenge some of the ruts and plateaus in personal growth this must bring…

  1. I made it a goal to begin saying Thank You to people who contributed to my day to day feelings of enjoyment, or belonging
  2. Meaning say Thank You authentically and directly to … random people, for taking the time and making the effort to provide, something intended to raise up other people in some way. (I do NOT mean writing to celebrities, they get enough praise and attention)
  3. This goal horrifies me. I tend towards short concise emails and hit send before my inner critic catches on and makes me wuss out. If someone replies I get anxiety and just respond with a smile and thumbs up emoji.


Why? Whats the big deal?

Maybe you do this kinda stuff already? Maybe it’s effortless? Or maybe, if you’ve ever been silenced, shutdown, or minimized significantly, either as a child or through an adult relationship, you’ll know how uncomfortable it can be to put yourself back out there and be visible again.

Here is what I’ve learned, from lived experience and from many heart to hearts with friends, who also engage in daily activism through visibility…

To be visible is to be vulnerable.
Don’t be fooled by the performance of it, by swagger or designer labels. We all have our safety shields.
To be visible is to be at risk, putting your core identity on display, is the ultimate form of bravery.

So for you… Yes YOU strutting your visible self out on the street. Know that you’d get a nod from me and my best Ohhhh Heck Yes! smile, for a soul already braver than most.  Because I know how such moments fortify us, through those other moments, when we’d give anything to just be invisible.


Oh look here it is… my best  Ohhhh Heck Yes! smile to help you picture it, aimed in your direction.

The Sun.png


As we’re on smiles, here’s a Big Proud Joyous Grin too…

at being able to support and escort this long time friend, on her first Trans March as an “out” Trans-woman at age 50. A friend who survived the violent attacks on her earlier attempts to shine,  and a moment when “ending it” seemed like a better option than the slower more painful death of the spirit from living in fear, shame and isolation, trying to be invisible. PTSD is no joke.

So  like I said earlier VISIBILITY. Brave. Vulnerable.
Fueled by smiles. Making the world a better place. Be thankful.

The Future Begins

So… what happens if you’re too Weird for the Queers and too Queer for the Weirdos?

Formerly a lot of confusion let me assure you. There’s no loneliness like the loneliness of finding a “community” and …. well, feeling like you’re still not home. Anywhere.

But hey! That was before “genderqueer” existed folks. Before binaries and the lack thereof. Before Lesbians too, because they didn’t exist until Ellen (apparently… judging from the global reaction to it).

Now, everything’s on a “Spectrum” we can do and BE what the heck we want!

Lets Start an Endless Kweirdo Posse.

Then lets enjoy this visual of a spectrum and all the things it’s going to mean for identity.


Too Weird For The Queers and Too Queer For The Weirdos — EKP